Saturday, June 2, 2012

I can't be liking this

I haven’t been writing very many blog posts lately. Well, I have actually, I just haven’t been posting them. Two of them in particular I have decided are too personal and as such am not comfortable sharing them with the world.

But today during my run. Yes, I run now. I came up with another blog post. I actually said in my head, I wrote this in my head during my run today. I really did. I even laughed at myself, which threw off my breathing rhythm, I might add.

I get a lot of thinking done, while running. I have my earbuds in and the tunes are blazing loud, but I can’t just turn my brain off. Todays thoughts were of how different it is running at week 5 as opposed to week 1. Week 1 is always a struggle. My lungs would burn and I’d have to stop not because my legs hurt but because I couldn’t breathe. I was sore, and it took the rest of the day to recover. I remember my lungs/chest would still have a burning sensation that evening. It was hard. And once I had to stop and walk the rest because I gave myself an asthma attack. I can only remember 3 times in my life when that has happened.

Now my lungs don’t burn. They are stronger, and I think I have managed how to breathe so that they won’t hurt. I run a bit farther now, and I am not sore at all. Recovery is quick, and I think I am actually starting to enjoy it. I know, Eeeee gaddssss! Still, no marathons for me. My only limitations now are when I get side stitches. Those can be painful. Most of the time I can tell myself to keep going, saying “work through the pain”, or “pain is good”. Perhaps I’m a bit sadistic, but when I start running funny and the breathing gets wonky because of the stitch, I do have to stop and walk it out. At first I thought it had something to do with what I am eating for breakfast, but whether it’s a banana or bowl of cereal, sometimes I get a stitch and sometimes I don’t. Today I did, and had to walk for a bit to work it out.

I was also thinking today that I have always used the excuse of having Valley Fever, as to why my lungs always burn, and why running is hard for me. And there may be some truth to that. I do have compromised lungs, but I contracted Valley Fever over 6 or 7 years ago now. And for a time afterward, years actually, I did notice that breathing was more difficult when at high altitudes or while exerting myself (think of that how you wish). But I can’t use it as an excuse now. Today, I do not have smoker’s lung. I never smoked in my life, not even pot in college. I know, that is somewhat unbelievable coming from someone who went to Humboldt State, aka, pot capital of the U.S. But it is true. I can count on one hand the times I have smoked a cigar, and then proceed to puke my guts out. I never wanted to smoke, because I already thought I had weak lungs and didn’t want to compromise them. So when I got Valley Fever, I was bummed, yes, but glad that I hadn’t already weakened them from previous bad habits.

That was quite a tangent. Anyway, I also decided on this run that I need proper running shoes, and that the trees that have purple leaves year round are quite pretty, and that the adventist church waters their grass way too much. Their sprinklers are on every single day. Granted their grass is very lush and green, but it seems a bit excessive. Who knows what will pop into my head on tomorrows run.

*addendum: Finished week 5 and ran 5 days. I was apprehensive about weighing in, but I did it anyway. I really want to buy that DVD sitting in my amazon account. Was utterly heartbroken when I did. I weigh exactly the same as I did before I even started all of this. Now I’m all depressed, surely I would have lost even a pound. But I can’t let this stop me. I need to do more. So, I’m going back to eating less carbs again. No more cereal for breakfast, no more pasta, potato chips, and bad snacks, and only brown/ whole grain rice. Also going to kick the soda habit. Soda’s usually causes weight gain, so maybe it’s time to kick it again. However, soda was my reward for running, so I have to come up with something else... perhaps it needs to be non-food or drink related this time. I’m using this weekend (Saturday & Sunday) to jump start the soda detox, and needed to give my knees and hips a rest anyway. Monday will be the start of week 6. Also decided not to weigh in again until week 8 is done. So, 3 more weeks of waiting to buy that blasted DVD. It’s worth it though.... right?

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